Well, that could have gone better.

[val_corax]

So, I managed to touch base with Jacinta and the meeting did not go terribly well. I did my best to apologize for the whole ring incident years back, but nothing. Said I still had to prove myself. Which basically means that any sort of burying the hatchet on that end is never gonna happen. I tried. I am now officially washing my hands of Jacinta and ever trying to make amends with that particular wolf.

The real problems started when she started asking me about Naomi and Nick. Naomi was easy and I rattled off everything that I could remember. I only ever got to say that Nick was an old friend of mine, before Jacinta started needling for more information. Jesus fuck. I do not do well when getting questioned by people who just stare at you and radiate Rage. She kept asking who else knew about Nick and eventually dragged Salem's name out of me. Fuckityfuckfuckfuck.

I never got to tell Jacinta all the good things Nick has managed to do over the years. In the what? Twenty years(or something like that) that he's been a Mage in this city, never once have I heard a peep about him having done something that some wolf would take a serious objection too. I mean, I'm certain he's done stuff that would count as irritating and annoying. Everyone does. But he shows some respect for our Sacred Places, even if he only views them as 'the goose that lays the golden eggs' and only a fool kills the goose. He also has a respect for life - even life that isn't human. I've seen that in him time and time again.

Her big focus was that I hadn't told any of the Alphas or her(the Warder) about the Mage in the city. That I showed a lack of Wisdom in doing so. That it was her Duty and her Duty alone to decide what was a danger to the Sept. Bullshit. I am not a Sept Member. Never have been. Never will be. I have /never/ been fully welcomed here. I owe this Sept NOTHING. Did the Fox practically have to beg to be allowed to make certain that the Caern would return? Doubt it. He probably just decided to show up and got away with it because he is 'Kinfolk'. And he knows about Nick. Figured it out on his own. He has more of a Duty to tell the PURE ONE Warder about Nick a fuck-lot more than I ever did.

Told Silvertip that I had a Mage-Friend once and he trusted my judgment and didn't press for a name. He showed me kindness and understanding. He showed a level head and a thoughtful mind. Thought that if Nick was ever found out, he'd at least stop and ask if this was the Mage I knew before jumping to any nasty conclusions.

All I've ever seen out of Jacinta is bitterness, Rage, and that stare of hers. I don't know her. I don't know if she'd /learn/ anything from what I know.

Teach them what they'll Learn - Corax have not been telling Garou about specific things for more generations than I can count. We remember the War of Rage, even if we didn't suffer through it the way the other Shifters did. We know what Garou can do and we know that they often kill the good people along wit the bad. Sometimes, to keep the good safe, you have to keep them hidden from the wolves. That is Corax Wisdom - not blind obedience and deference to the wolves.

I...

The only good thing to come out of all that was permission to leave Jacinta info-packages. Maybe she can scare the wolves in to working on some stuff that has been forgotten and left unresolved.



Salem isn't really a friend of mine and quite frankly, he scares me. But, he has been kind to me in the past and I have returned that kindness by all but 'throwing him under the bus'.I think I've I've done more harm than good to those I actually care about in any way, manner, or form. I'm certainly not doing Nick any favors these days...

Jacinta asked if Nick has seen the Mage-Knife. Told her that he was there when I got it from the Furies and that we'd discussed it. He never handled it and I said as much. Jacinta clearly wanted more out of me, but I don't feel comfortable telling her more. I have no idea where she stands and really don't want her to see Nick as a threat.

Still haven't figured out how Jacinta managed to peg Nick as a Mage from a stupid pile of rocks and a light-show.

Maybe I can help a little by talking with the Alpha. See how he feels about Mages. He is more open than Jacinta and a hell of a lot easier to read.


Maybe its just time for me to move on? I really enjoyed my time in the Umbra. It is so much more of a home than the Realm some days... But no, not quite. I have things to accomplish first and kids that are still dependant on me. Time to smile and laugh loud enough to push aside everything else. Time to go hunting and pick off a few Buzzards.